I’m so sorry

I’m sorry.

I didn’t really get it until today.

Never have I understood the depth of hatred that some people have.

Today I was reading blogs on WordPress and I did something I don’t often do and that was search a topic and start reading. I searched teenagers. Mostly because they have been on my brain to write about and thought I’d see what other are writing about.

One headline caught my eye…..

“Teenagers (white of course) are looking better than ever.”

Ew that statement made me feel like vomiting for so many reasons. To stop reading was like turning away from an accident. Every statement was more racist than the first and I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I absolutely have never read, heard or met anyone with such awful beliefs.

He ranted all kinds of white supremacist craziness. Trump is his favourite person in the world and clearly thinks he’s in power to infect the world with the red pill which I have no idea what that is but I get a very bad feeling when I read about it that it is very much hitleresque sentiments.

There was so much disgusting and blatant racism I could not even imagine. I am still in shock. I guess that’s good. I have not grown up around anyone who talks like that and I grew up in a home where we were taught everyone is unique, special and important. Well my eyes have been opened. I now have a better idea why people of any colour of skin, any culture or race or heritage other than white I guess. Though they seem to have the same hate for Jewish people (all of whom I know in my circle are white) so I don’t get that part. They just seem to just hate everyone I guess with any sort of tradition???

Anyways I am now understanding when my friends with beautiful colours of skin say, “you don’t know what it’s like”. I get that statement now. I have never been the target of such horrible comments. My family has never been the target of such hate. I can’t imagine anyone not getting super upset if those comments were directed to them.

The worst part of the whole blog (well there are two equally appalling parts) was the fact that the guy is a teacher and that so many people commented in agreement.

As a teacher, he was discussing how he is infiltrating the minds of his youth and explaining to them how important it is to keep every non white in a position of powerlessness. Unreal. Now I’m imagining the poor black or Muslim kids in his class and how awful he must treat them. Their parents may not even be aware of how horrible this teacher’s mind truly is. He is passing in his horrid theology to these kids and none of the parents would be aware.

The second worst part is the hundreds of comments that are in agreement with him. Yes I read those too because I was praying hard that people would be slamming this moron really hard for his completely insane words. I was horrified even more as I read comment after comment of appreciation for this man “teaching his kids the white way”.   All discussing what You Tube videos to let their kids watch (Dude Perfect is okay because it’s 5 white guys and Cosby Show is not okay) and how Trump is going to take over the world.  Sickening.

I feel like Canadians are much more accepting of everyone as we are such a diverse culture but now I’m thinking maybe I just haven’t been the subject or the target so I can’t guess how much racism prevails in the minds of some Canadians. Oh my heart aches for anyone who has ever been the receiving end of such awful words. I’m so sorry to anyone who has ever felt the sting of such atrocities.

I still can’t believe this exists still today in 2019. I was oblivious I guess. I thought stories of such awful behaviour like in the book “the Help” were horrible times of the past. I didn’t think people acted like that or thought like that or talked like that today. I thought Hitler was a thing of the past and people wouldn’t think like that anymore but apparently there’s large groups of pure hatred and evil lurking around. Disguised as teachers and who knows what else.

I just don’t understand why anyone would think they are so much better than someone else. Anyone. We are all made the same. Same bones. Same blood. Born from DNA from two parents. I don’t know where along the way people start to think we are so different. We are all human. We all have feelings.

There is no happy thoughts in my mind today. I am just looking at everyone in a new light. Wondering what evil thoughts are in people’s heads. Wondering why God hasn’t wiped us all out by now. His heart must break more and more everyday. I feel as though my heart has broken today. It’s good though. I will forever be changed. I will have a much deeper empathy for minorities of any kind.

So how can I get this sadness out of my mind? Watch a movie of course. When I turn on my movie that I had clicked on the other night but never started as I fell asleep instantly I knew God had wanted me to wait before I watched it.   Ever heard of the movie, “If Beale Street Could Talk?” Oh my.   Watch it on Amazon Prime if you can.   So good.   I wouldn’t have understood it as much as I did today.   It was waiting for my small mind to take it in.   I can see now why so many black people really do believe as the one character says “White people really must be the devil”.  The corrupt police.   The injustice.   The justice system that judges them before they really listen.   The over crowding of the judicial system in the States that causes innocent men to take a plea to just have an end in sight.   The comments.   The racism.

Before today I took offense to the statement “White Privilege”.  I still am not sure I like it but it makes more sense now.   I was not born on the streets of Harlem.  I was not born on Beale street.   I was born a blonde haired angel who would never be in want and never have those kind of horrible words spoken to me or about me.   I won’t be accused of breaking the law because of the colour of my skin or where I was born.

I will forever try to help others see how beautiful they are.   Every colour, every shape, every ability or disability.   The human body is amazing.   As hard as that horrible man tries to preach that he is superior, we must show love and teach equality.

Equality for everyone.

If you read all this thank you for listening.   If you agree please share.   Write your own comments of love for everyone on this page.   Teach your children how beautiful everyone is and that God made everyone special.

My greatest hope is that none of this is offensive to anyone except the idiot who wrote that blog.

SDG